I’m a big fan of Patrick Ness, I’ve read The Monster Calls and his Chaos Walking trilogy so I was totally prepared to cry, scratch that, I was prepared to ugly cry. Like ugly.
This book is about grief, I guess a lot of the books I’ve read recently have been about grief and how to deal with it but this one was so very different. Again I do these reviews or discussions (maybe?) discussing whatever it is that struck me, so if you’re looking for an actual review review you’re def in the wrong place. Anyhow you’ve been warned ya’ll.
This book echos a basic idea of what happens when we break. When we just…can’t accept what’s happened and the lengths that we’ll go to not face that. The main character is faced with horrible decisions that set off a domino effect that will forever change his and his family’s lives, something that causes them to literally create a new reality, one that takes away that pain but leaves the echoes haunting them all.
The book takes twists that I wouldn’t have imagined honestly, so it’s really worth the read but I think what really struck me was end. It’s no secret I’ve struggled, I ended a terrible, abusive relationship not long ago that broke me, me, the person I never thought would break. I had no idea how to deal with the new broken version of myself (of course I sought professional help and that eventually would help bring me to a place of peace) and I remember feeling as if maybe I’d never be “normal” again, maybe I’d never be able to handle pressure again, maybe I didn’t want too any longer. I was afraid of uncertainties. I felt that I just couldn’t. That there was nothing more. But that was the biggest lie. There’s always more. One more sunrise, one more chance to laugh, one more risk to take that may change everything. Everything is uncertain and there’s nothing wrong with that. This book reminded me of that. There’s nothing wrong with not knowing, that’s the point right? That and learning how to live there right?
This book reminded me of all that. And that you don’t always win, but that doesn’t mean you don’t keep trying.